4/02/2010

Cub Scout Skit #2: The "Real" Thanksgiving Day


The "Real" First Meeting Between the Pilgrims and Indians

CAST:
Pilgrims 1-5
Indians 1-4

PROPS:
Optional: pilgrim hats for pilgrims
Optional: feathered headdresses for Indians


[5 Pilgrims are rowing towards the new world.]

PILGRIM 1: We've been rowing this boat for 4 months now -- even my callouses have callouses!

PILGRIM 2: I definitely need a vending machine

PILGRIM 3: I definitely need a bathroom.

PILGRIM 4: Hey, isn't that a rock over there? Yes, it IS a rock! Land ho!

PILGRIM 5: Thank goodness! I wonder what kind of place this is, and who lives here?

[Pilgrims step out of boat and lay down oars. They are met by Indians.]

INDIAN 1: How.

PILGRIM 1: Does that mean "hello" in your native speech?

INDIAN 2: No, he's asking how you got here, black and white strangers. Don't they have color where you come from? [Turns and speaks directly to audience.] And they call us barbaric?

PILGRIM 2: Sure they have color -- we just don't believe in it. Listen, we've been paddling for a while to get here and, frankly, we're pooped. I don't suppose you have any food you could loan us?

INDIAN 3 [always has eager/goofy expression on his face]: Are you kidding? We've got corn bread, corn on the cob, corn flakes, corn meal, popcorn, corn oil, corn chex, corn nuts, corn pone, and corn curls!

INDIAN 4: Thanks a lot, Dances with Corn. You should hear his corny jokes.

PILGRIM 3: I think we just did.

INDIAN 1: If you're feeling perky, we could go hunt some turkey.

PILGRIM 4: What's a turkey?

INDIAN 2: Big bird. Many feathers. Really stupid, but tasty.

PILGRIM 5: After 4 months of rowing I'm not sure we're up to hunting smart birds, but stupid birds we can probably handle. Can we join you for a hunt?

INDIAN 3: And then you can join us for a feast! We'll have roast turkey and corn, and then afterwards we'll challenge you turkeys to a Nintendo competition.

ALL PILGRIMS [looking confused]: Nintendo? What's Nintendo?

[Indians smile knowingly.]

INDIAN 4: Come into my teepee, palefaces. I have a feeling you're going to like it here in the New World!

[Gestures for everyone to follow him to his teepee. Everyone walks offstage.]

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