2/25/2012

You Know Global Warming is Getting Bad When ....

Signs that Global Warming is becoming a serious issue:
  1. The Statue of Liberty strips off her robe and goes skinny dipping
  2. Kansas becomes beach front property
  3. Your strawberries are marked "imported from Siberia"
  4. Polar bears shed their thick white fun and reveal themselves to be koalas
  5. The movie Titanic becomes most famous as a documentary about icebergs
  6. Inuit children learn to swim
  7. Iceland renamed "Lutherania"
  8. Jack London starts writing about tropical climes
  9. San Diego becomes a popular snorkling destination
  10. Penguins overpopulation become a threat to ocean ecosystems
  11. Seagulls take out all the pigeons, ducks and squirrels, solidifying their hold on US-wide food scrap franchise
  12. Santa officially relocates his headquarters to Macy's department store
  13. Municipalities sell snow removal equipment and use money to buy snowcone machines
  14. Deprived of snow days, schools decide to start closing on high pollen count days
  15. Snow angels replaced by sand angels
  16. The cliche "white as snow" slowly replaced by "white as Marie Osmond's teeth"
  17. Snow White becomes spokeswoman for melanoma prevention
  18. St. Bernard's re-purposed to carry sunscreen
  19. Derricks in Texas become deep water drilling platforms
  20. Children stop begging for dogs and start begging for sea otters
  21. Polar Fleece stops manufacturing winter coats and starts marketing fleece bikinis
  22. New York City destroyed by riptides
  23. GM, Chrysler and Ford start manufacturing boats
  24. Mt. Everest becomes famous for its epic waterfalls
  25. North Dakota finally has tourists

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